Everything Happens To Me (Chet Baker)

Hi.

Alright. I agree – this title is a little too dramatic. But I promise, it is true. At least lately.

“I make a date for golf and you can bet your life it rains;
I try to give a party, and the guy upstairs complains.
I guess I’ll go through life just catching colds and missing trains;
Everything happens to me…”

So, remember the problems I have been having about my apartment? Well, my ex-apartment?
Since that problem is yet to be solved, I still have not recieved my money from my ex-landlord. Or from my roommate on that account.
And since I didn’t have the money, I didn’t get around to paying my current housing.

And guess what happened?

They are charging me an extra 150 for being late.

“I never miss a thing, I’ve had the measles and the mumps;
And when I play an ace my partner always trumps.
I guess I’m just a fool, who never looks before he jumps;
Everything happens to me…”

And now I have to explain this to my parents, whose accounts I had to use to pay my bills, not to be charged even more for being late.
I feel like I completely failed this year, and there is nothing I have done right by them.

I’ll tell you one thing: Bashfullness is tiring. It’s soul-consuming.

I haven’t felt happy, like genuinely happy, for so long.
And it’s wearing me out. The sadness, the bashfullness, the tiredness. All of it.

I truly wish I could have something, or better somebody, to break this jinx for me.
Some unexpected love to turn the trick to end my despair.
Sadly, however much I want to give into the dreams of this miracle “one” to turn everything upside down, I know he is nowhere to be found. And believe me, I get it. I expect too much. I do.
But “too much” is the only thing that can get me out of this shit that is “too deep”.
Some grand turn of Karma. The fantastic entrance of balance, back into my life,
because truth be told: “now I just cannot fool this head that thinks for me;

I mortgaged all my castles in the air”

And I don’t know what is next, and I don’t know if I can make it through.

Cheers.

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One thought on “Everything Happens To Me (Chet Baker)

  1. Pingback: The Tree Of The Knowledge Of Good And Evil, Part I: Jenny | Hipster Intelligence Agency

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